The other day I sat down and wrote out a list of things I want for this house. Bad idea. I don't recommend this. While I had hoped it would give me a small feeling of organization and direction, it did nothing but give me a feeling of anxiousness and disappointment.
Just so we're clear, I LOVE this house. It has so much potential I can hardly see straight. I have mentioned before the things that Cody and I plan to do to it - remodeling the kitchen, staining the floors black, widening the doorway in the living room, etc. I'm so eager to see it all put together. The past few nights I have walked through this house in my mind...everything is done and it's beautiful. I imagine where I would put all my Christmas decorations and where I would hang our pictures. I imagine dusting an entry way table, napping on our living room sofa, hosting parties under new light fixtures. None of these items currently exist, you see. No new kitchen, no entry way table, no living room sofa.
They will all come in time, of course, and that's ok. I keep reminding myself that it's up to me to make this a rad home no matter what state it's in. It's up to me to make sure that my home is warm and welcoming. That friends like to be here and feel comfortable here. Until we can remodel the upstairs bathrooms, I will probably always wince at the wooden toilet seats (who thought that was ok??). And until our kitchen is done, I will always shake my head at our sky blue countertops (again, who's idea was this?).
The list of things to do to the outside of the house is long, too. Ripping trees out, putting trees in, new gray/purple shake shingles and a red door....sigh, I must be patient. It will come in time, right? Right. Although a cool computer desk would be so great right now. Adding it to the list...